Review: BAMF Shit Kicker 29er

29er Cross Country
A $1,999 carbon fiber race rig with enough style for the Chuck Norris of hipsters.

How much more black can it be? None. None more black.

Some bike brands struggle a lifetime to find their voice, floating aimlessly from one persona to another – like throwing darts at a board while blindfolded – hoping that one of their marketing strategies will stick and bring in customers. It’s a pathetic approach to marketing, but all too common in the bike industry.

If there’s one thing you can’t fault BAMF Bikes for it’s having an aimless and mundane brand image. If you haven’t already figured it out, BAMF stands for Bad Ass Mother F*cker, and their logo isn’t a bar graph of how much more badder asser they are than competitors, it’s a raised middle finger. However, unless you’re a pinky amputee, I’m pretty sure most middle finger salutes involve at least four visible digits.

Custom “Up Yours” saddle. I guess it really is a middle finger.

BAMF is like the Dennis Rodman of mountain bikes; you either love them or hate them. Go to either their website or Facebook page and simply start reading. If you aren’t offended by references to tattoos, clean needles, putting dudes in choke holds, throwing dollar bills at strippers and repeated use of f-bombs, then you just might be the target market for a BAMF bike. In fact, if the below excerpt from the BAMF Facebook page describes you, then you belong in the BAMF “army”:

A BAMF—that’s who I am. It’s what I am. And it defines everything I do, from my clothes, my tattoos, and my beard, to my taste in music and art. I’m hard. You don’t want to fuck with me. You are not my bro. I am the Chuck Norris of hipsters, and I know every Chuck Norris joke in the book; even the dirty ones.

Rules? I make my own. The last thing I’ll do is follow yours, so don’t even try to make me. You’re not like me. I’m not fit for your pretty corporate picture—I won’t be your Dwight. You can keep your suit, your Mercedes, and your shitty nine to five. I’m young, and I’m completely ridiculous, and I’m not about to change. The way I live is the way I choose to, and nobody gets in the way.

Wait, there are dirty Chuck Norris jokes? Anyone care to enlighten me?

If you don’t know, well now you know.

Even those who might be turned off by the adolescent, cocksure and classless marketing approach will be attracted to BAMF for one main reason; value. BAMF buys direct from manufacturers and sells their bikes online through, which means huge savings for the consumer.

One visit to the BAMF website and you’ll see a theme – every bike is black. To quote Nigel Tufnel in Spinal Tap, “How much more black could this be? The answer is none. None more black.” BAMF claims that they don’t waste time fighting over color palates, but it’s probably because frames with no graphics and paint are cheaper to produce.

Continue reading for more on the BAMF Shit Kicker 29er and full photo gallery.

About the author: Kurt Gensheimer

Kurt Gensheimer thinks the bicycle is man’s most perfect invention. He firmly believes ‘singlespeed’ is a compound word. He sometimes wears a disco ball helmet. He is also known as Genshammer. He is a Gemini and sleeps outside in a hammock.

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  • bob becker says:

    Not a customer since I don’t fit their customer profile. However, by the time you add wheels, handlebar and the “pro-build”, you’re at $2700. A Price Point carbon frame (especially one purchased during one of their many sales) and careful component selection could easily match the SK.

  • John W says:

    Hey GW, you recently posted a review on the Bailey 29er. Curious how you would evaluate these two bikes in a shootout…

  • Mark says:

    600 mm bars? That alone suggests these guys don’t ride enough to design bikes.

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